| -digging a hole for yourself |
Pre-Gravedigger saying |
| -bit off more than you could chew |
Warning before teeth were invented |
| -cut off your nose to spite your face |
A common medieval practice |
| -livin’ in the fast lane |
Meth addict |
| -greatest thing since sliced bread |
The greatest Vertical Portal since Google! |
| -green with envy |
A rare afflication of jealous bitches |
| -chip off the old block |
Back when men were wooden |
| -don’t bite the hand that feeds you
|
unfinished: bite the FOOT that feeds you |
| -better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all |
Ancient Greek Joke |
| -the emperor wears no clothes |
Ancient Greek Tradition |
| -plenty of fish in the sea |
When bestiality was more accepted |
| -what will be will be |
Stuff is stuff |
| -if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right |
Don’t fuck this up |
| -if at first you don’t succeed, try and try again |
Keep going till I tell you to stop |
| -there’s no time like the present |
Hey it’s about now… now |
| -waiting with baited breath |
Stop eating sushi |
| -potty/toilet mouth |
Talking Shit |
| -mouth like a sailor |
Very gay and/or italian |
| -a snail’s pace |
Like being behind the fat lady in the supermarket |
| -you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink |
Correction: That fucking horse WILL drink. |
| -stupid is as stupid does |
Dumbass |
| -catch as catch can |
cootchy-coo? |
| -busy as a bee |
Minimum Wage Worker |
| -old as the hills |
Pre-Bon-Jovi |
| -been around the block a few times |
A slut that fucks whores |
| -just fell off the turnip truck |
Immigrant worker |
| -read me like a book |
Amateur Vivisection |
| -a rolling stone gathers no moss |
The Rolling Stones suck… |
| -shot to hell |
FRAGGED |
| -shot in the dark |
Shot through the heart |
| -shoot first, ask questions later |
LA Police Tactics were used |
| -trouble with a capital "T" |
Illiterate Gang members |
| -shotgun wedding |
Bridal Gangbang |
| -been there, done that |
Ex-girlfriends |
| -knee jerk reaction |
Getting hit in the balls |
| -a chain is only as strong as its weakest link |
You have a gay friend |
| -an eye for an eye. a tooth for a tooth |
Organ swapping is okay |
| -one bad apple spoils the bunch |
Your weird uncle Larry |
| -something rotten in Denmark |
The Danish are Filthy |
| -Vini, Vidi, Vici |
The truth is in the Brine: A form of Sea Monkey worship. |
| -monkey see, monkey do |
They mean sea monkeys, and they do |
| -cool as a cucumber |
You are a squash |
| -if wishes were horses then beggars would ride |
Fuck the homeless |
| -like a bat out of hell |
Women drivers |
| -hindsight is 20-20 |
Your ass has eyeballs |
| -better late than never |
Better Never than really late |
| -once bitten, twice shy |
Vampire alert! |
| -if you can’t walk the walk, don’t talk the talk
|
The Handicapped should be gagged |
| -if you can’t take the heat, stay out of the kitchen |
Don’t eat cheese on sundays |
| -kill’em all, let God sort’em out |
Sir, Yes, Sir |
| -walking on thin ice |
Figure skaters |
| -beggars can’t be choosers |
Poor people do what you tell them |
| -walking on eggshells |
Anorexic Ballet |
| -knock on wood |
Jerk off for luck |
| -damned if I do, Damned if I don’t |
Damn it |
| -it’s a cakewalk |
I like pie |
| -ain’t just whistlin’ Dixie |
A gaping Vagina |
| -jumping on the bandwagon |
Jumping on the Gaping Vagina |
| -passing the buck |
Toss me that deer! |
| -too little too late |
Sex with Asians |
| -till the cows come home |
You fell asleep in the barn |
| -from dusk till dawn |
I had sex with George Clooney |
| -like there’s no tomorrow |
Tomorrow never Dies |
| -can’t see the forest for the trees |
Your head is in your ass |
| -people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stone |
Don’t vandalize near a witness |
| -time flies when you’re having fun |
It takes 20 minutes to find your pants |
| -so hungry I could eat a horse |
Hey I’m Fat! |
| -chew you a new asshole |
Cannibalistic Surgery Requested |
| -well slap the dog & spit on the fire |
This spoon requires washing |
| -from famine to feast |
What happens to housewives |
| -selling like hotcakes |
Drugdealing pays off |
| – the pot calling the kettle black |
use a pipe to smoke weed |
-when the going gets tough, the tough get going
|
Punch your horse to make it go faster |
| -put my foot in my mouth |
Podiatry is for everyone |
| -through hell or high water |
Through NO-Clip and Wall-hacks |
| -it ain’t over till the fat lady sings |
Fat People Ruin Parties |
| -it beats picking cotton |
No one wants to be black |
| -like an accident waiting to happen |
Like an Asian Driver |
| -if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it |
Break this |
| -am I my brother’s keeper |
My brother is a Dog |
| -if everybody else jumped off a bridge, would you? |
If all your friends removed their spleens with salad forks would you? |
| -ask & you shall receive |
Gimme that |
| -never look a gift horse in the mouth |
Don’t kiss horses |
| -every rose has a thorn |
Life ain’t nothing but bitches and money |
| -fit for a king |
Birthday suit |
| -you can’t judge a book by its cover |
People look funny |
| -there’s no honor among thieves |
Rip off your criminal friends too |
| -no use flogging a dead horse |
It’s illegal in most states anyway |
| -only the strong survive |
Beat up weaklings |
| -survival of the fittest |
If your clothes dont’ fit, God hates you |
| -the meek shall inherit the earth |
Keep consuming you Capitolist bastards |
| -every dog has its day |
Hump my leg! |
| -dead as a doorknob |
This doornkob is a squirrel |
| -caught between a rock and a hard place |
Prison sex |
| -you better straighten up and fly right |
Turn Heterosexual and become a Pilot for Delta |
| -when hell freezes over |
When you fix all your mental problems |
| -when pigs fly |
That guy in the seat next to you on airplanes |
| -a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush |
Don’t masturbate with parrots |
| -a penny saved is a penny earned |
Get a real job |
| -more fun than a barrel of monkeys |
Improper packing techniques may work in your favor |
| -one in a million |
Where babies come from |
| -no use crying over spilled milk |
Salt and milk taste terrible |
| -the grass is always greener on the other side |
Your neighbor paints their lawn while you’re asleep |
| -you can’t teach an old dog new tricks |
Dead animals can’t dance |
| -another face in the crowd |
People suck |
| -shooting yourself in the foot |
Missing the Money Shot |
| -two birds with one stone |
KILLING SPREE |
| -never say never |
James bond is here |
| -a watched pot never boils |
Just smoke your Weed |
| -like shooting fish in a barrel |
Like having sex with a blender |
| -what’s good for the goose is good for the gander |
Stuff your pillow with ducks! |
| -we all have our crosses to bear |
Jesus hates you |
-skeletons in the closet
|
I have to hide the bodies somehow |
| -the old gray mare just ain’t what she used to be |
This is the most single most confusing statement in all human history |
| -fit to be tied |
Bondage freaks |
| -to the victor goes the spoils |
Hey Victor took out the trash! |
| -don’t make a mountain out of a molehill |
Men with Big trucks |
| -all’s well that ends well |
Vacation sucked |
| -give an inch, take a mile |
Porn star magic |
| -judge not, lest ye be judged |
Don’t be pointing fingers |
| -right as rain |
This situation is damp |
| -et tu, Brute? |
Word |
| -the die is cast |
This Gamer is dead |
| -on top of the world |
I’m in china |
| -that’s the way the cookie crumbles |
My pastry is expired |
| -let sleeping dogs lie |
Dogs are liars |
| -grin & bear it |
Smile and Sleep through winter |
