I used to work at a retail job a long time ago, and when I would walk in every day a certain manager would always cheerily say “Hey how are you!?” And for months I would always say “Oh good thanks, I’m fine, doing fine” etc. He would quickly step over my comments and say things “Great! Good good” and it became apparent very quickly he wasn’t listening…
One day I decided that I would say the things I was thinking but match his cheerful tone. So for months I would come in and the exchange would be something like this —
Him: “Hey how are you today!?” *Super cheerful*
Me: “I’m a cog in a corporate machine and sometimes I think I’m not real!” *uber cheerful*
Him “Great! Awesome”
Me: …
The thing was, the TONE was all that mattered and not only did he NEVER notice the content of what it was I said, he actually commented several times on my “positive attitude”.
Here are some other highlights of things I shouted cheerfully across a store to a manager –
Him: “Hey how are you today!?”
Me:
- “I feel like a drone in an army of bees!”
- “I woke up wondering if this is hell!”
- “I am so hungover I think I jumped a curb today!”
- “I feel empty and my life is hollow!”
- “I dread every day here like the plague!”
- “I had 12 nightmares about spiders!”
- “I’m speaking in a cheerful tone so you can’t see my pain!”
The moral here is two things:
1. It’s not what you say it’s how you say it
2. Never ask me about anything in the mornings.