Why Google can Have My Privacy

Google, go ahead, take my privacy.

Why? Because Google rocks, they can have my privacy, all of it, I trust them. Fly Google Fly, like the bedazzled sexy phoenix I know you are. Get out there and collate and seperate you great big beautiful search engine.

You’re probably wondering why I’m ranting about Google. Well I finally got pushed over my limit. I’ve seen countless articles about how Google is taking your privacy and that they have TOO much control and too much information. This is retarded. Microsoft having all your data (which they already do) is somewhat scary but even then, it’s just a big faceless corporation. But Google is constantly trying to do good and new things and I say Fuck it, let them. At every turn someone pisses on their attempts to change the world.

  • Google wants to index all the worlds books, huge lawsuits rear up and it’s eventually abandoned.
  • Google wants to combine all your medical history into one huge secure database so healthcare will be easier and cheaper, people freak out that someone gives a shit that they take suppositories for being a paranoid and impotent jerk. But really.. who the hell cares?
  • Google wants to map the whole fucking world, from top to bottom and with pictures, and people are afraid it will endanger them and violate their privacy. You live in a fucking house and make 50k a year, you’re a middle class fuckwad with delusions of grandeur, not a god damned super spy who hangs pictures of the latest invasion plan on their FRONT fucking door… You know that right?
  • Google runs their own 411 service based off voice ads instead of paying some godawful amount and people bitch about the ad’s… why? asshat.
  • Google holds all your email ever and people are scared that they get ad’s targeted to them… Dear god now you’ll be FORCED to buy Tide with Bleach, you shitmonkeys.

Google, from me to you. Go for it, keep it up. Offer the world free Wifi, index the worlds information, and change the way society works. Are you so goddamned content with the planet that you are willing to just let shit stagnate because it never gets any better than this? This world is full of idiots and scared people and conspiracy nuts who are all cramping Google’s style. They make a fuckton of money and they do it in a subtle way that really doesn’t bother me. They offer everything they make for essentially free and less hassle than many paid solutions. So WHY oh god WHY is everyone pitching a damn fit when they want to do something new. it’s a company run by two GEEKS, they want to do good things and have the best shot in the WORLD to make differences that no one else could make on a such a grand scale.

You should all go give Google a dollar and shut the hell up about your privacy. Because you’re worried about whether or not Google knows if you email your brother in wisconsin and less worried about the US government arresting without warrants and watching you take a shit. Go write something about that. Let Google rock the planet. I know I sound like the saddest kind of fanboy, but I really just like Google and every single one of their plans has been outstanding and generally only fail due to ignorance or paranoia. If more people were doing what google is doing, “No Evil” and to make the world easier to understand and communicate… I wouldn’t have to hate you all so very much.

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