Pay less for Comcast Internet
When your bill comes back up to full price (40-50 bucks a mon.) then you call them up and basically say:
You: Hey I\'ve always paid 30 dollars or so for service and it went up!
Them: oh that\'s our regular price, we prey on the weak!
You: umm, odd. But anyway I had a lot of trouble getting signed up with you guys I\'m sure you can see the notes on my account!
Them: *pretends to look it up, beats level 9 of minesweeper* YES!! I mean yes, I do see that here.
You: Well I think with all the problems I\'ve had with you guys and I didn\'t know how much it would jump up to.
Them: Well it is our standard price, and you smell funny.
You: I what?
Them: Oh nothing! *cough*
You: Anyway \"“ I saw a promotion in the mail the other day for even less than 30! can I have that.
Them: Oh (you hideous fool) that\'s for new customers and/or TV cable customers.
You: I heard that, you just said \"Parentheses hideous fool\"
Them: I\'m sorry ma\'am you must be mistaken.
You: Look, Is there some promotion you can get me on or do I have to cancel and sign up again?
Them: Ah wait there is something *Level 10 minesweeper completion* Let me just check…
*The sounds of frantic typing while they stare longingly at a wall clock and cry silently* —
Them: Yes we have some promotion currently for 20-35 a month, will that do! smelly?
You: I took a shower
Them: sure you did, how\'s the price?
You: Yeah I guess
Them: Great! I\'ll just switch your pricing, this whole conversation has been a farce to make sure you really wanted it.
You: Wanted what?
Them: Please do not comment on my internal monologue ma\'am, Can I help you with anything else today?
You: There is something very wrong here and I!.
You: What the!
ELAPSED TIME: 11.3 minutes
Follow this dialogue exactly, even if they don\'t